Sunday, May 22, 2011

It's Been Such a Long Time

I finished finals and moved back home for the summer. The posts should become a bit closer to regular now. I just thought I'd check in and update before I hit the hay.

On a side note, I went out for a run today because it's finally been consistently nice enough to get back into running shape. I lifted all winter so while I did get bigger, my cardiovascular fitness went to shit. I did a few 250-300 meter sprints today and I was wiped out. Normally I could do 5-10 of em and then hit a 4 mile run easy. Guess it's been longer than I thought. Well, time to start waking up early and tossin the ol' running shoes on. Wish me luck!

Darken Rahl.

Monday, May 16, 2011

Organic Microcellular Biochemistry 2

To all 3 1/2 of you that read my blog, I apologize for not keeping up with a regular posting. School is ending within the next week which means finals are blasting me in the face and I've very little time to update with all the crazy crap from my melon. I promise I'll get back on this as soon as I can and I'll check in with all of you as well. If you're bored, click a random post in the archives on the right side of the page and hopefully that crock of lunacy will hold you over til I can write something of moderate to nuts-o quality on here. Again, my sincerest apologies.

Shoe shine.

Sunday, May 8, 2011

10,000 B.C.

I think we can all agree that Greg is the only naturally come upon name in the English language. If you're confused, let me explain. Waaaaaay back in the good ol' days, back when huntin' and gatherin' was a man's sport, everybody had simple names. There was Grog, Oog, Tok-tok and so on. Eventually, mankind shied away from hunting and gathering and began to settle down and begin the era of subsistence farming and fiefdoms and metal ages and whatnot.

As each new age came the names of the people within them had to evolve too, right? Well, Grog thought so. Grog's son was named Grug who named his son Grig who named his son Grag who EVENTUALLY named his son Greg. At that point, Greg stuck as an accepted and modern name. What'd Oog and Tok-tok do? They died. That's what. They just couldn't evolve and adapt. Now I think we all can agree that Greg is the only naturally come upon name. Unless you have another one?

Back to beating the Elite Four in Pokemon for the umpteenth million time. As always, please click the StumbleUpon button below and help me continue my experiment, pleeeease :)

Lucky Lights Candy.

Tuesday, April 26, 2011

My Girl

Sooo Sophie made me watch Marley & Me the other day. Up until then I had refused up and down to watch the movie because I knew it was going to make me cry. Wellll she talked me into it and I watched it. Guess what? I cried for the last fourth of the movie and then for half an hour afterward. Oh yeah, cried. I wasn't just a bit misty. Tears welled up in my eyes and went streaming down my face by the boatloads. I couldn't help it! Marley reminded me of my yellow lab, Dyna, from when I was growing up. We got her when I was about one and I had her for fifteen years. She was my girl, and now I miss her even more :(

Gee thanks, Sophie, for making me cry loads and loads in front of you. Awesome, hahaha.

Capumcap.

(P.S. If you wouldn't mind hitting the stumble button below these words I'd much appreciate it. I'm doing a little experiment with stumbleupon and help would me great! Thanks much!)

Monday, April 18, 2011

Like a Rock

So for anyone who knows me in real life or has read some of the archived posts from my blog (specifically this one) knows I'm an EXTREMELY heavy, yet very active sleeper. My best friend Zach has taken to writing down some of the gibberish I say in my sleep.

My latest conversation, according to him, was about me trying to trade apples for chocolate. Apparently I sat straight up and asked "How many apples is a chocolate worth? I'm not sure how many apples I can trade for one piece of chocolate." Then I mumbled a few more things about how I was confused on the exchange rate and laid back down. What the HELL was I dreaming?

For those awaiting more frequent updates, my apologies as I've been very busy as of late. I try to keep 2 or 3 updates a week but things don't always work according to plan. I hope you continue to check in with me and enjoy the crap I write :) Also, I know the last few haven't been of the best quality compared to my archives. Don't worry, I'll get the weird funny stuff up here again.

Thursday, April 14, 2011

Lost Her Marbles

My mom is nuts, I swear. She's always saying gibberish stuff and forgetting she asked me questions and so on. One such incident I decided to write down. This happened mid-January while I was still on winter break. The conversation went something like this:

Mom (looking in our fridge): I'm so sorry for-
Me: Wha?
Mom (still in fridge): Oh you're gonna acknowledge-
*Pause*
Me: Mom, you just said 2 incomplete sentences. What are you talking about?
Mom: Dates, prunes and applesauce! (Pulls some random container of goop out of the fridge)
*Me sitting there completely dumbfounded and confused*

WHAT THE HELL JUST HAPPENED?! I have no idea what was going on in her head or what she was saying/meaning to say. My mom has lost it.

Stump-jumpin Jethro and the funky bunch.

Wednesday, April 13, 2011

Get by with a little help

If you're bored, head over and check out this I recently made. It's a wussy prank I pulled on my friend Kevin. Problem is I need something better. Help me out, my friends?

Use me up.

Tuesday, April 12, 2011

Let me show you them

Whenever I doze off for a couple seconds I have extremely quick, full dreams. They're also really weird so I quick write them down before I forget them. My latest one, which lasted about 10 seconds in real life, was about a guy who was pissed at me. Why was he pissed? Well, I play this game (It's called Dragon Warrior Monsters, it's on the Gameboy Color) that's basically like Pokemon. In my dream, the man couldn't bet on my monsters in the battle they were in (for some reason) and instead he had to bet on Hockey. HO BOY was he PISSED. Go figure.

Infrequent Smiles.

Tuesday, April 5, 2011

Motoring

My favorite song to clip my nails to is Sister Christian by Night Ranger, in case you were wondering.

Necco.

Monday, March 21, 2011

Because, it's a shoe store!

If anyone who is reading this (all 2 1/2 of you) is wondering why I have those random words after every post that sometimes make sense but usually dont, I have the answer! It's gibberish. I finish the post with whatever words are in my head at that point in time and I can usually tell you what I was looking at or thinking if I re-read them. That's it. Nothing special or cool. My apologies.

Are you a crackpot?

The White Ape

Well, the State Regulator Lady (who cares what her name is?) showed up at work today and my boss told me to make myself scarce. I'm not really sure why but I wasn't about to stick around and find out. Now I've been sneaking around our building for a good hour or hour and a half and I'm typing this from my phone in a dark corner. They'll never find me. I feel like Chris Farley from the White Ninja or whatever the name of that movie is. Only difference is I'm not fat, on cocaine, and swinging over walls on a palm tree. No disrespect intended, Chris Farley was hilarious. It's just that cocaine isn't my white powder of choice.

Tastes kinda oaky.

Sunday, January 16, 2011

It lived a good life....well, not really

It is 7:53am, I've been up all night and I've broken our shitter.

Um, the two aren't related and to be fair I only broke the seat on it....I think. I heard a crunch but didn't bother checking cuz I'm tired. Good night. Or morning. Whichever.

Low frequency.